Go with what you’ve got to raise eyebrows

If I were queen of the world, I would ... how would you finish that sentence? If you’re of the male persuasion please insert “king” in place of “queen.” I’m an equal opportunity dreamer.

Even though there are more things than I can count on my fingers and toes I would either change, have done or make happen, today it’s all about hair. For instance, why does there seem to be such a big difference in the amount of money spent on keeping hair growing than there is on making it go away from places there should be no hair? Let that sink in, then think of this ... eyebrows. Too much, too little, yep, that’s where I want to go today.

You know who had iconic eyebrows? Groucho Marx. He had these big, black, hairy mud pies over his eyes. He made a mint by being able to raise one or both of his furry friends. Of course his mustache, voice and quick wit also helped to put him on the map. But those eyebrows, they were like they had a life of their own. (Feel free to Google him and see)!

That being said, in everyday life having a couple of caterpillars growing over your eyes might not be the thing to do. I’m just saying.

Eyebrows seem to have made a comeback recently. At least I’ve noticed them more. It started when I saw a commercial about a new eyebrow makeup apparatus. I remember eyebrow pencils. Lightly used to fill in spots in brows that seem to have bald spots, or to lightly shape the over the eye area after plucking. (Really, if you wanted hair there why did you pluck them)?

This thing I saw is an eyebrow brush filled with color, like mascara is used for eyelashes. But this is for eyebrows. Eyebrow mascara. Specifically for eyebrows. Make them darker, more prevalent, bigger, fuller, and bushier. Use it just like mascara — run it in and out of the holder, making that squishy, sucky sound, then brush it across your brows making them as big and dark as you want. Honest! Now when it rains not only does your mascara run but your eyebrows melt and cause rivers of waxy color running down the curves of your face. That’s attractive!

I have, as you can see if you have met me, not taken the best of care of my eyebrows. They’re just there, on my face, living their simple eyebrow lives. They’re two separate entities on my face, thank goodness. But I don’t pluck or shave or add to my brows. I don’t like pain and I have seen the look of pain on reddened browed faces of friends and ladies at the salon who have had plucking or waxing done. Yeouch!

However, I’ve seen some really nice looking brows. Some ladies can pluck to make brows that are fine lines that arch just right. Nice looking, expression-causing lines of hair that raise up and down in sequence or separately as their mood changes. Quite unique.

But way over on the other side of the spectrum there’s a new, or what I perceive as new, trend to make eyebrows bigger, fuller, more distinct, prominent and, yes, more Groucho-Marx-like. Just as the eyebrow “mascara” has come on the scene, new eyebrow pencils are here, too. Making brows bigger, bolder, browner or blacker. Now I’m all for making you feel good about yourself, but not to the extent when my face meets your face the biggest thing I see are these big ol’, drawn-on mushroom caps over your eyes! Chances are your natural brows are just fine. You might try to just go with what you’ve got.

Makeup seems to make circles in life. Cleopatra painted her face quite extensively. Marc Antony seemed to appreciate it. A lot! In the movie anyway. I wonder though, would he have enjoyed her if she didn’t paint her face on? When I look at what is perceived as being what she looked like all I see are these huge black-framed eyes and eyebrows painted so that look like they could reach out and grab the last muffin off the plate at the courtesy brunch table on a movie lot. Eyebrows can, if you’re not careful, take on lives of their own. Muffin munching eyebrows, now there’s a visual!

Remember the second golden rule, “everything in moderation.” If you don’t know the first golden rule, well, go out, learn, and follow that one too.

Trina lives in Eureka, Nevada. Her book ITY BITS can be found on Kindle. Share with her at itybytrina@yahoo.com.